Day one without Bruno has been a doozy. Today would be his 8th birthday. Waves of emotion come and go. I smile when I think of him, then cry because he’s physically no longer with us. On one hand it’s so quiet, and on the other his absence and the void is enormous. It’s strange to let Daphne out, to go the restroom, and to only hold the door open for her to come inside. I keep feeling the need to hold the door open longer as I always had for my boy who was always slightly lagging behind. I miss the pitter patter of his footsteps across our floor. The sound of my tripawd; the clicking of his first two steps followed by a slight pause and then the gentle drag of his remaining hind leg following behind. Today, as I got into our Tahoe I noticed that the seatbelt was fastened and realized that yesterday my husband had buckled in Bruno (now ashes encased in a black box) into the passenger seat as they’d taken their last drive home together. It made me cry, such loving care taken of our boy. Daphne seems okay for now. She’s wired differently than him. She’s a sweet girl but less in tune with human emotion and more easily distracted by her drive for whatever it is we wave in front of her. As for now, I’ll take it day by day.I plan on honoring his memory, spoiling Daphne, and spending overdue time with the four boys he and Daphne blessed us with.
Happy Birthday Bruno!